Getting Married? Find out what your fiance’ needs…

Great Read # 1  for the Bride and Groom -

What is the most powerful motivation for a woman in her marriage? For a man?

Here’s my thoughts on a book that has a great answer to that question!

I don’t just photograph weddings because I like gowns and flowers and cake (although Bryan and I do love cake!)…I truly am crazy about Marriage (as you probably already guessed) – I think it is the single most important relationship you will ever have, and I can’t tell you enough how my heart desires to help my brides and grooms have the best, strongest, and most incredible marriage possible. I enjoy hearing their story and sharing in their wedding day as I photograph the Wedding Ceremony and Reception. But, the wedding day is just the beginning of what is in store for a bride and groom.

So, with our upcoming 5th Anniversary, I will be sharing with you a few of the most beneficial books that helped us start our marriage out on a more solid foundation. First of all, I do not want you to think we know the perfect recipe for a happy and perfect marriage…everyday is a day to learn more about growing together in our marriage, and learning to be a better spouse for each other- and our journey has only just begun! But this book and the others I will write about have truly been a blessing and major help in what we have as husband and wife – which is why it is on my recommendation list for all.

Don’t disregard this book as a typical marriage book by its title – the message is pretty profound, even for those who have heard the cliche’ before. Women, brides, wives,  if you think all your man is looking for is that you genuinely love him, you must read this book! If you think your man only should have your respect if and when he deserves your respect – YOU MUST READ and consider, and even TRY the points in this book!

I think the best way to introduce the author and his concepts is by this quote from Dr. Eggerich’s website:

“We believe love best motivates a woman and respect most powerfully motivates a man. Research reveals that during marital conflict a husband most often reacts when feeling disrespected and a wife reacts when feeling unloved.  We asked 7,000 people this question: when you are in a conflict with your spouse or significant other, do you feel unloved or disrespected?  83% of the men said “disrespected.”  72% of the women said, “unloved.”  Though we all need love and respect equally, the felt need differs during conflict, and this difference is as different as pink is from blue!” – Loveandrespect.com 

The first book I cannot write enough about is “Love and Respect” by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. Bryan and I were given this book and workbook as a wedding present, but we didn’t pick it up until one of our “arguing that first year of marriage” tense moments. I am so glad it was in our home when we needed it, and I believe it has been the SINGLE MOST BENEFICIAL READING for our marriage. I wanted to let you all know because it meant so much to the two of us, I know it will only help anyone who will listen. If you are super interested – Dr. Eggerichs and his wife Sarah speak frequently at conferences all over! Although there are none scheduled this year for Alaska, there are some coming up in Washington sate. By the way, as you read some of the examples in this book, keep three things in mind:

a) You don’t have to force your love to read it…while 2 people pursuing relationship enriching wisdom is extremely beneficial, the points, mindsets and techniques in this book can be successful with just one individual understanding and making a choice to follow the techniques in this book.

b) This can and has SAVED a failing marriage..You will read examples of individuals who refused to let their marriage fail without trying everything possible, and by reading and following the points in this book, were able to win their spouse back over and strengthen their marriage.

c) The message in this book is written by a Christian author, but the techniques work for anyone and are proven. Give them a try and see if your relationship doesn’t benefit!

I have changed my whole approach to respecting Bryan and he has changed his approach to loving me, and it has done wonders for our marriage! It is a daily challenge, because, as you will find – these techniques aren’t natural, we have to learn HOW to provide what our spouse needs. Dr. Eggerichs describes what he calls “The Crazy Cycle” that we experience that can cause our resentment of our spouse to cause us to act disrespectful or unloving towards them, which causes them to act disrespectful or unloving towards us, which fuels our fire more, and so on. This truth that we can find hope in that this book is centered around is found in the Bible in the book of Ephesians (Ephesians 5:33):

“Husbands must love their wives and wives must respect their husbands.”

So there you have it! Please let me know if you decide to check it out! I really hope it will help you and your relationships!

Jessie and John’s Wedding Previews in Girdwood and Anchorage Alaska!

So, this past Saturday, my associate photographer Jennifer Hammer and I drove out to the Bible Valley Chalet in Indian, Alaska (right near Girdwood). The sunrise on the water off of the Seward Highway was phenomenal…and I knew it was going to be a gorgeous day for a wedding in Alaska! We passed people climbing the frozen water run-off’s on the mountain side of the Seward Highway, and saw a few moose who were probably enjoying the beautiful morning as much as we were, especially after such bad weather the day before! We pulled into the Bible Valley Chalet and began examining the lighting and planning our shots etc. Miss Jessica Bowlin, her mother, and her bridesmaids arrived on time, with hair done and nothing but smiles. She said she was nervous, but you’d never know it by the way she was able to laugh, chill and get ready with her mom and friends! The day went perfectly, and the wedding party was super tough to get some really fun photos outside in our cozy 12 degree weather. I love that they brought sunglasses, it made for really great personality pictures and also seemed to bring out more laughs and smiles which were great for the Wedding photos. Jessie and John were super fun-loving, and brought their ski boots for some authentic Alaskan Winter Wedding pics. The reception was at the Bayshore Club House in Anchorage, and was elegant and cozy, with it’s lodge like feel, high ceilings, soft lights, beautiful views and gorgeous fire blazing in the fireplace. This was an awesome party – it was great to see that so many people could cut loose and dance the night away! It is such a privilege for me to take a part in such a happy and special day like this for a couple, and there is no doubt that Jessie and John are perfect together! Just look at them! Click to view Larger!

Short Blip – Networking with Other Photographers

Hey! I am so excited to watch Zach and Jody from Nashville at their Wedding Weekend Creative Live Seminar in the comfort of my own home! Check out their site @ ZachandJody.com … these folks are full of great insights and wisdom. I love successful individuals like these two who are passionate about sharing their experiences and knowledge base to help others! I have run across two types of business leaders and photographers so far, those who realize the influence and benefit of Networking, and those who seem to hoard any ideas or information that is helpful in the least. I find it surprisingly odd – while I understand that we are marketing to the same clientele and it can seem like helping the competition, I find that the idea of having a strong friendship / network with other great photographers can help in more ways than one – a few of my reasons right off the bat include:

Mutual inspiration and education- I love talking with other photographers simply because they are the only group of individuals who are as interested in it as I am! Give me a few minutes of your time, you will burn out of talking about f-stops, ISO’s and exposure shortly if you are not into photography much. There is a reason why we choose friends that have mutual interests – photography is no different! We can inspire one another as well as teach each other helpful tips. Don’t worry about “sharing secrets”. Your styles will always remain very different.

Building Opportunities for Clientele – If I am friends with Susie-Q, a photographer in the Anchorage area, and she receives a call from a bride who is getting married on May 5th, but she has a wedding already booked, or her price point does not meet the bride’s needs…if she then refers that bride to B. Weiss Photography because she knows me, and that I am another reputable Wedding Photographer in Anchorage, Alaska… Bam! I just received a referral – a prospective client who otherwise may not have been directed to my business – simply by networking with another professional. It is necessary to mention that it is good to scratch the back of some one who has scratched yours. If you get referred to by a photographer, keep them in mind! Next time you have to decline a client, refer them!

Obviously the mindset in this ideology is that of “empowering others” and having the heart of a teacher. Think about individuals who have taken the time to teach you valuable information – they become some of the people you most admire and respect! That is why I think so many of us like people like Zach and Jody! And believe me, if I ever hear of a couple looking for a Wedding Photographer in Nashville I am 100% going to recommend they check out Zach and Jody. By being helpful and inspiring, they have created a lifetime walking talking billboard (me) which is the best type of marketing – and it’s free!

I am super excited to continue watching Zach and Jody this weekend and am so thankful for the tips and tricks they continue to share to help photographers keep their work cutting edge!